Sunday, December 18, 2005

Ishmael: My Very Own African Mail-Order Groom


As I began writing tonight's entry, I heard that familiar ding on Jdate that alerts you to someone interested in having an Instant Chat. Annoyed at the disturbance, I was quite surprised at the site of the voluptuous Jamare, from Ghana, captured in the photo here. The following was my conversation with Jamare/Ishmael, my African Mail-Order Bride (sorry, Groom.)
Jamare: Hello
Jamare: How are you doing?
ILikedYourProfile: Fine, Jamare. How are you?
Jamare: am fine
Jamare: My name is Jamare
Jamare: and you?
ILikedYourProfile: Ellen.
Jamare: Nice name
ILikedYourProfile: Thanks
Jamare: am 30 and you?
ILikedYourProfile: 31
Jamare: okay
Jamare: am male from Ghana
Jamare: and you?
ILikedYourProfile: female from New York. my, you
have a very feminine look, Jamare.
Jamare: I dont have jdate id so i use my sister own.
Jamare: My real name is Ishmael.
ILikedYourProfile: Ah ha. I knew it all along.
ILikedYourProfile: So what brings you to jdate and
chatting with American women?
Jamare: Becouse am single and looking for a serious
woman for my life and my sister ask me to come in
jdate.
ILikedYourProfile: Aren't there any serious women in ghana?
Jamare: Am looking for white woman for my life.
ILikedYourProfile: Interesting. That may be a bit
difficult in Ghana.
Jamare: Yes
Jamare: I hope you arenot mad at me.
ILikedYourProfile: and your sister wants to meet a
white man?
Jamare: Yes
ILikedYourProfile: Have you ever been to the United
States, Ishmael?
Jamare: Am now look to come and live there.
Jamare: That is why i am looking for you.
ILikedYourProfile: Really. When are you coming?
Jamare: If you will accept me for you life.
Jamare: Love can make you do things that you never
thought possible.
Jamare: The best thing about loving and being hurt is
that you get to know what true love really is.
Jamare: True love can blind you but at the same time
if you let it, it can also open your eyes.
Jamare: Love, an emotion so strong that you would
give up everything.
ILikedYourProfile: Are you Jewish?
Jamare: No
Jamare: Why do you ask?
ILikedYourProfile: Um, because this is a Jewish
website.
Jamare: Yes, but I like white Jewish American women.
Jamare: Can i give you my numberso that you can tex
or call?
Jamare: To just feel it once, to know that you are part
of something special, and perhaps my bride.
Contribute your funny dating emails to ilikedyourprofile@gmail.com

3 Comments:

Blogger Stephanie Green said...

Freaking hilarious! I may have some ammo for you; need to dig through my JDate inbox for some best ofs...

5:31 PM  
Blogger Ben Baruch said...

So far, Ishamel of Ghana has had more luck with Instant Messages on JDate than I have.

9:56 AM  
Blogger Keith said...

Strangely enough, I got an IM on JDate from some woman in Ghana yesterday too... must be a hotbed of Jews there.

11:11 PM  

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